Dear Tyler - [NICU Day 15]

Dear Tyler,

I love checking my email each morning to learn about your progress (daddy signed me up to receive daily emails from your nurses).  In this morning's email I learned that your day yesterday was much like the day before... you gained 1.5 ounces and took in 38% of your daily intake by mouth.  That makes me so happy!

Speaking of being happy, there were several people who were pretty happy to meet you today!  You got to meet your aunt Beki, uncle Bryce, and your great grandma and grandpa Hudson.  They all think you're pretty special.

Grandma and Grandpa Nye also came to visit and got to hold you for the first time.

I think all the excitement of visitors wore you out - you were pretty tired after your busy morning and weren't too excited about eating lunch.  That's okay.  We just cuddled while you took most of your food through your nose tube.  We'll work on feeding again tomorrow.

One other thing before I head to bed for the night... you have a new cousin!  Joseph Jayden (JJ) was born this morning.  Your aunt Michelle and uncle Joey are going to be awesome parents.  And isn't that great that you'll have a little boy cousin your same age to play with as you grow up!?!

Love,
Mom

Dear Tyler - [NICU Day 14]

Dear Tyler,

I can hardly believe you're already two weeks old.  It's crazy to think that you've spent the last 14 days in the NICU.  You are doing so well that I'm getting more and more anxious to take you home.  I just want to spend all day with you and cuddle you any time I want to.  You sure like my cuddles.  When I put you back in your crib at the hospital after holding you, you get a little fussy and your heart rate increases so much that your monitors go off.  I told daddy that you are going to be a momma's boy :-)

Today you weigh 3 pounds 13.1 ounces... that's up 1.6 ounces from yesterday!  You are getting so close to that 4 pound mark.  I think you are being rewarded for eating so well.  You've been more alert during your feedings which is awesome, because you're able to take more food through your mouth.  Yesterday you took 38% of your food through a bottle, compared to 7% the day before.  I'm interested to see how you did today!  Unfortunately any milk you take in from breastfeeding doesn't count right now, so two of your feedings today will have 100% through your nose tube and that will kind of screw up your percentages.  Oh well!  I think it really only matters as you start eating more and more through your mouth.  When you hit 80% through your mouth you'll get to take out your nose tube.  Let's get there soon, okay?!

Love,
Mom

Dear Tyler - [NICU Day 13]

Dear Tyler,

Happy Thanksgiving!  We sure have a lot to be thankful for this year.  I am most thankful that we are now a family of four and that even though you were born early, that you are healthy and doing well and have some great nurses watching over you.

I was able to visit you a couple times today, but this evening was extra special because your daddy and I got to give you a bath!  The nurses have given you sponge baths before, but I think this was your first tub bath, and I was excited that both your dad and I could be the ones to bathe you.  It was also neat because they took all of your wires off for your bath (minus the nose tube).  You had your bath under a warmer and then got a nice warm blanket to dry off with after your bath.  You seemed to like your bath for the most part... at least when you were all covered up!

By the time your bath was over, you were wide awake so I got to try breastfeeding you, and then you took a nice little nap laying on daddy's chest.  You both looked so comfortable.  Daddy looks forward to doing that even more when you come home (as do I!).

Love,
Mom

Dear Tyler - [NICU Day 12]

Dear Tyler,

I got a call from the doctor first thing this morning with some excellent news... You were doing such a great job of maintaining your temperature that you got to move out of the incubator and into a crib!  I was totally surprised because you only weigh 1670 grams and they had told me that you needed to weigh 1800 grams before moving into a crib.  Seeing you in your crib just makes me happy.  Plus, it's so much easier now to change your diaper or pick you up to cuddle.

You were only awake enough to try breastfeeding for one of the three feedings I was there for, but you did awesome the one time you tried.  I'm thinking within the next few days we will get to try breastfeeding before you take the milk through your nose tube. They will weigh you before and after to see how much milk you were really able to get (the lactation specialist asked me if you were swallowing or just sucking - I didn't know so I'll pay more attention next time).  I'm hoping that we can increase the percentage of food you are taking through your mouth... that's your last big hurdle before getting to come home!

And one more picture for today.  Your daddy actually took this picture a couple days ago of you holding onto his finger.  I think it is super sweet.

I sure love you.

Love,
Mom

Dear Tyler - [NICU Day 11]

Dear Tyler,

I was able to spend most of the day with you today.  It's interesting to try and balance how much I hold you verses how much you stay in your incubator.  You are in your incubator to help you regulate your temperature, and when we pull you out to hold you, you burn calories trying to stay warm.  I definitely don't want you burning calories - you've gotta keep gaining weight!  At the same time, you can't just live in that little box all the time, and our cuddle time is so important for both of us.  Anyway, when I take you out to hold you or feed you, I just try to keep you close to my body and all wrapped up so you stay warm.

You didn't gain much weight today yesterday - just 2 grams.  You also aren't taking as much of your milk through the bottle.  Part of that will be because when we try to breastfeed, we don't try feeding you with a bottle at all (you would be too tuckered out to try and do both).  That's okay, we'll just keep trying.  They did increase the amount of milk you are taking at each feeding to 34 ml (from 32 ml)... I think it's always a good sign when you get more food.  Even though you are getting most of your food through the tube in your nose, you seem to be handling/digesting the food well.

I continue to try and help with your care while I am visiting you... taking your temperature and changing your diaper.  Today when I changed your diaper, I wasn't fast enough getting the new one on and you peed all over your clothes and your blanket.  I'm sorry I wasn't faster... I'm blaming all of those cords I have to work around (although I'm sure that won't be the only time that ever happens)!  Needless to say, I got to change your clothes for the first time today.  I'm also looking forward to helping with your next bath which will be on Thanksgiving!

Love,
Mom

Dear Tyler - [NICU Day 10]

Dear Tyler,

You continue to make progress, slowly but surely.  You are up 14 grams from yesterday, which puts you at 1607 grams (3 pounds, 8.7 ounces).  The nurses also tell me that your billirubin levels are good - no more blanket here!  Another positive is that they were able to drop the temperature a little in your incubator since you are doing better on maintaining your own temperature.

Today was kind of a special day for me.  We had our first "skin to skin" time where I got to hold you against my chest and just let you sleep there.  I think I could have stayed like that all day.  You seemed so peaceful and comfortable, and I felt like I was doing my job as your mom.  You also tried breastfeeding for the first time.  I thought you did great! Sure, it wasn't much and wasn't for long, but you tried and you did get a little bit of milk, so that made me happy.  We'll keep trying, hopefully a couple times a day.  They say that it will get easier for you as you get a little fat on your cheeks!

Love,
Mom

Dear Tyler - [NICU Day 9]

Dear Tyler,

Guess what!?  You got to meet your sister today!  She has been so excited to come and see you.

The first thing she did was wash her hands and arms up to her elbows for two minutes (like we do every time we come to see you).  Gotta get rid of any germs!

I think you were ready and waiting for her, because you were wide awake when we arrived.  Of course she thought you were "so cute".  She knows that she needs to wait a little while longer to hold you, but she softly touched your cheek as daddy held you - her touch put you right to sleep :-)

I got some good one-on-one time with you after daddy took Kylee out to the waiting room.  We chatted a little about the Boise State game last night and I also read you a book.  By this time you were sound asleep, but I talked to you anyway :-)  Speaking of talking to you, I think I forgot to tell you how proud I was of your weight gain yesterday!  You gained a whopping 3 ounces, bringing you up to 3 pounds 8.2 ounces.  I try not to get too excited, because I know that number can fluctuate on a daily basis, but still, I was impressed.  The nurse told us how you nipple fed 35% of your intake (the rest was through the tube in your nose).  Not bad! The nurse also talked to me about trying to breast feed you tomorrow.  I'm a little nervous and excited all at once.  Hopefully you'll be awake enough to give it a shot!

Love,
Mom

Dear Tyler - [NICU Day 8]

Dear Tyler,

You are such a trooper.  It looks like yesterday's move was pretty hard on you.  You lost 45 grams and are down to 1507 grams, or 3 pounds 5 ounces.  I'm glad you didn't lose 8 more grams or you'd be out of your clothes!  Daddy thinks that maybe you burned a lot of calories waiting for your incubator to warm up when you got to Meridian (they didn't realize you didn't qualify for a crib yet, so didn't start warming up your bed until after you got there).  Fingers crossed that you gain some of that weight back today.  I think mentally it would be hard for me to see you have another rough day and be undressed again tomorrow.  You're also not eating as much from the bottle... you've just been so tired.  I think you're trying to get your energy back. That's okay, we feed you whatever you don't eat through the tube in your nose.  I know that you'll get stronger and gain more interest in eating soon.

Tonight is a Boise State game so I stopped by the Bronco Shop across the street from the hospital and picked you up a fancy new hat.  They didn't have any preemie hats, so it's a little big on you, but I still think you look mighty handsome in it.  Did you know that you were born right in the middle of a football game?  I got to watch part of the game last Saturday as we waited for you to join our family :-)

Love,
Mom

Dear Tyler - [NICU Day 7]

Dear Tyler,

Today was a big day for you!  First, let's talk about your growth... you gained 2 ounces!  I'm thinking it's all that breast milk I'm pumping for you :-)  Actually, they are adding a calorie boosting powder to any milk or formula you receive.  Anyway, the weight you gained puts you up to 3 pounds 6.7 ounces and means you were big enough today to get dressed. And you look mighty cute in your new clothes if I do say so myself.  I snapped this picture of you just as you had a giant yawn.

Part of the reason we could see how cute you look in your clothes is because you don't need the billiblanket anymore.  Hooray!  That sure makes it easier to cuddle with you.  Speaking of cuddling, your dad got some nice cuddles today.  And he even got to feed you.

Finally, you had your first ever (and hopefully only ever) ride in an ambulance today because you were transferred to the Meridian NICU.  Your dad and I were pretty excited about this.  It only takes us 10-15 minutes to get to your new home.  And you lucked out... you have your own private little room, as opposed to a curtained off section of the NICU like most of the other babies have.  Not sure how you got so lucky, but we'll take it!  And I have my own room there too, making my visits with you even that much more comfortable.  We're hoping the move wasn't too stressful for you.  The nurses tell us that sometimes babies will take a dip in their progress after a big move.  We'll be rooting for you to continue to make good progress so you can come home soon.  We love you so much.

Love,

Mom

Dear Tyler - [NICU Day 6]

Dear Tyler,

Today was a good day.  I got to hold you for quite a while and that made me happy.  You were still wrapped in your billiblanket so I didn't get to cuddle with you the way I would have liked to, but I know that will come soon.  In fact, your jaundice levels were lower than where they needed to be to take you off the billiblanket, but they wanted them just a little bit lower in case you rebound a little bit once the blanket is off.  They tell me it should be off tomorrow.

You got your IV out of your belly sometime before I came to visit today.  It's awesome that you're able to get all your nutrients through your bottle and feeding tube.  You continue to eat really well.  The nurses told me that yesterday you gained 30 grams.  That puts you at 1495 grams, or 3 pounds 4.7 ounces... just barely over your birth weight.  But the best part is that once you reach 1500 grams you get to wear clothes :-)  I am positive that you'll gain at least 5 grams today, so tomorrow we will get to dress you!

I am getting to help more with your daily care.  Today I took your temperature and I changed your diaper (this is done every three hours, right before you are fed). I had to ask the nurse if I did the diaper right because it looked kind of funny.  She assured me that I did it right... it's just that even the preemie diapers look so gigantic on you - the bottom of the diaper is down near your feet!

Finally, we made a pretty big decision this evening.  We decided we wanted to move you to St. Luke's Meridian tomorrow.  They have a Level 2 NICU there, which is where little kiddos like you who aren't really "sick" can go.  Since you are doing so well (breathing on your own, no extra meds, etc), we can move you there (as long as doctors at both facilities agree - they will chat tomorrow).  It is much smaller than the Boise NICU (20 beds compared to over 60), but it has a lot of advantages for our family.  One big advantage is that we will be closer to you all the time so can visit more often and for longer.  Another is that we, as your family, will be assigned a private room right near that NICU.  I can use the room to pump or to go to the bathroom or to take a meal or even stay overnight if I want.  The medical staff at St. Luke's Boise have been great, but I know that you'll get equally great care in Meridian.  Hopefully you'll enjoy your new room too!

I sure am looking forward to your big day tomorrow!

Love,
Mom

Kylee Turns 5

Last week I asked Kylee how she would feel if her brother was born on her birthday.  She told me she would be sad because she would want to open her presents.  Good thing Tyler was born two days before her birthday!  Almost as soon as I found out that my 24-hour monitoring was being cut short and that I was being moved to labor and delivery to have our baby, my mind turned to Kylee and her presents. I had pulled them all out on Wednesday and had planned on wrapping them, but ended up being kind of lazy that evening, thinking I still had a few days.

I'm thankful for my friend Jen for saving the day!  She offered to go over to my house and wrap Kylee's presents.  She also made cupcakes and she and her husband even put up some birthday streamers at our house.  I was still in the hospital Monday (Kylee's birthday), so we arranged to have all of our family come down to the hospital to celebrate.  Kylee had told me she wanted everyone to "surprise" her... so following her instructions, everyone showed up a little early to a waiting room in labor and delivery.  Matt had Kylee's presents all in a large bag and had told Kylee they needed to drop some stuff off for me.  When they walked into the waiting room, Kylee beamed as we all yelled surprise.  She quickly opened all of her presents and enjoyed a cupcake surrounded by people who love her.  And I don't think she minded at all that the location of her party was at the hospital.

Kylee is just growing up too quickly.  I love how her answer to things this week is, "it's because I'm 5 now." Like when I asked her how she became so good at drawing, she answered "it's because I'm 5 now."  Also this week she learned how to spell her brother's name and is working on sounding out other words.  One sweet thing she did this week was offer to clean the breast pump equipment for me because my hands were getting so dry and cracked.  I told her that I need to wash them in the middle of the night - she responded by saying that I could just leave them dirty until she woke up.  Melted my heart.  I love her so much!

Dear Tyler - [NICU Day 5]

Dear Tyler,

This was my first day really away from you.  It was weird being at home when you were still at the hospital. I thought about you all day and I can't tell you how many times I looked at your picture.  I would just look at it and smile thinking about how precious you are.

Your dad, sister, and I all came to the hospital to visit you today.  Too bad your sister has a little cold... she wants to meet you so badly but she needs to get better first.  She hung out in the waiting room playing with the iPad while your dad and I took turns coming to see you.  We're hoping she's well enough by Sunday so that she can visit.

Today was the first day your dad was able to hold you.  You were all wrapped up in your billiblanket so you didn't really get to see him (when your billiblanket is on you get to wear these cool fabric goggles), but he was the one that tickled your little feet as he rocked you.  I wish I had been able to get a picture of him holding you - I'll be sure to do that soon!  We're hoping you don't need your billiblanket much longer - fingers crossed tomorrow will be the day.

You are eating like a rock star - nice work!  You are fed every three hours, and typically the amount you are fed is increased every 12 hours.  Since you are eating so well (I think the exact words were you "guzzled" your milk), the nurses decided to increase the amount of milk they are giving you every 6 hours!  Today you got up to 20 mL per feeding.  If you keep eating well, you'll get to get that tube out of your tummy.  It might even be out before I come see you tomorrow!

Speaking of milk, I'm going to brag a little bit.  My body seems to be doing much better now that I'm home and I'm getting a little practice with the hospital grade rental pump I have.  I am pumping for 15 minutes every 2-3 hours to try and get you the milk that you need.  The last few days when I would pump, I would spend about 20 painstaking minutes after each pump to try and get even two little drops (if I was lucky!) sucked up in the syringe to pass off to the nurses for you. Since I got home last night, my body has started producing a little more milk.  In my first 18 hours home, I was able to get close to 40 mL for you... and it's only getting better!  I'm hoping tomorrow that I'll be able to skip one of my times pumping and try feeding you directly.  Not sure if/how that will work, but I'm going to ask the nurses!

One final thing for today - you got a roommate named Audrey.  And you want to know what's crazy about that?  We know her family...they go to church with us.  Her mom works in Primary with me and her sister Laura is friends with your sister Kylee.  It's a bummer that Audrey needs to stay in the NICU, but since she does, I think it's pretty lucky that you get to share a room.  I'm hoping that her mom and I can keep each other company as we visit with you every day.

Love,
Mom

Dear Tyler - [NICU Day 4]

Dear Tyler,

Good news!  The procedure they did yesterday went well, and I was able to hold you today after all.  I spent quite a bit of time just holding you this morning.  You seemed so happy and calm as we just rocked. You are sleeping almost all day every day, but you opened your eyes a couple times for me today.  And I swear you even smiled for me a couple times - when I told you I loved you and when I told you daddy was going to come visit.

I can't believe how tiny you are.  I have never seen a baby so small.  You wrapped your little fingers around my pinky finger today.  I just loved feeling your touch.  You have lost about 2% of your body weight since birth, but they tell me you are eating well.  They gave you some milk with a bottle today and you drank it right up!  I think you like drinking through your mouth better than you like getting milk through the tube in your nose :-)  Hopefully that tube can come out soon... I think you'll be happier.

Today I met with a social worker and a family support nurse.  There is such a large group of people who will be taking care of all of us over the next several weeks.  We don't know how long you'll need to stay in the hospital.  We've heard anywhere from 3-4 weeks up to 7 weeks.  Before you can leave, you need to be able to show that you can breathe on your own with no problems, that you can eat on your own and that you can gain weight, and that you can maintain your body temperature on your own.  You also need to pass a car seat test... which I think just means that you can be transported safely in a car seat.  I was released from the hospital today, but I'll be back every day cheering you on as you work on reaching these milestones.

Love,
Mom

Dear Tyler - [NICU Day 3]

Dear Tyler,

I wasn't feeling very well today, so I didn't get to see you much, but I did get to hold you for just a few minutes.  You weren't very happy when I got down to visit you because you were having problems with your IV.  It had come out of your hand and your poor little arm was all red and puffy.

They tried and tried to find another vein that would work, but they couldn't find one, so they had to do a special procedure to put a line in through your belly.  They told me that depending on how the procedure went (if they couldn't place the line where they wanted to), we might not be able to hold you for a few days.  That made me sad, but I know it's important for you to get the nutrients you need.

I met with a lactation specialist today.  She said breastfeeding is completely different with preemies than with regular newborns.  I will need to get a hospital grade pump so I can work on getting you what you need.  I really wasn't able to get any milk today... hope that it doesn't take too long for it to come in!

You got to meet a few more people today... your daddy was able to show you off to your Grandma and Grandpa Hudson and your Aunt Rachel and Uncle BJ.  Your sister wants to meet you but she's been a little sick, so that will have to wait.  Hopefully she'll get to meet you soon!  Today was her birthday - she opened all her presents in the waiting room in the hospital!

Love,
Mom

Dear Tyler - [NICU Day 2]

Dear Tyler,

I went down to visit you a couple times today.  I got to hold you for about 30 minutes this morning.  I gave you a pacifier (which I felt was almost as big as your face!) and you did a great job of sucking.  I was so proud of you.  The nurses tell me you are doing great.  You are breathing well on your own - nice work! Sounds like those shots I got last week may have helped your lungs.  You got to meet your Grandma and Grandpa Nye today too.  They already love you, but who wouldn't? :-)

I also got to "feed" you today.  Really, that just meant I held a vial of milk as it went through a tube into your body.  But it still made me feel good that I was there for that.  I'm also trying to pump some milk for you.  I haven't been able to get much yet, but they say every drop I can get counts.  I spend 15 minutes every 2-3 hours with a pump, and then I spend the next 20 minutes or so trying to get every little drop into a syringe.  I was so proud of these little syringes.

I took this picture of you in your bed today.  Your Grandma Hudson says you look just like your daddy did in his baby pictures.  Lucky you - you are going to be one handsome boy!

Love,
Mom

Dear Tyler - [NICU Day 1]

Dear Tyler,

On Thursday, November 14th, I went into the doctor for one of my twice-weekly doctor appointments to see how you were doing.  We had found out earlier in the week that my body was not doing well... there was protein in my urine, which meant my gestational hypertension was elevated to pre-eclampsia. The only way to "cure" pre-eclampsia is to deliver... this made me nervous because your body still needed time to grow!  I had gone in that week for two shots to help speed up the development of your lungs in case they needed to deliver you early.  At my doctor's appointment, the protein tests still weren't good, so my doctor had me check into the hospital for a 24-hour monitoring period.  I was thankful she let me get my planned pedicure before checking in :-)

Your dad and I went to the hospital where they hooked me up to some monitors to check your heart rate and any braxton hicks contractions (which I didn't even realize I had been having) and did some blood work and other tests.  I thought things were going well... every time they checked they told me how great you were doing.  Little did I know that my body wasn't doing well.  My liver enzymes kept jumping up every time they checked, which wasn't safe for either of us.

On the morning of the 15th, they told me that they needed to deliver you and that they were moving me to labor and delivery.  Ready or not, it was time!  They started giving me magnesium to prevent me from having a seizure (I had advanced to severe pre-eclampsia).  Around 2:00 am on November 16th, after the magnesium had been in my body for about 12 hours, they started the pitosin to induce labor. They told me you would probably be joining our family that afternoon or evening!

At 2:00 pm that day they broke my water.  Your head was down low and there was lots of pressure, and I had an epidural at 3:00 pm.  The epidural definitely helped with the contractions... for a bit!  They started getting painful again later that evening.  I had to just try and breathe/whimper through them until I was dilated enough to push.  Your dad was so encouraging the whole time.  I was so glad he was there.

I didn't have to push much because you were so little.  You came into this world at 10:48 pm on November 16th.  I breathed a sigh of relief when I heard your little cry. I couldn't see much - there were lots of people in the room ready to take good care of you... but your dad was right there and just told me how good you looked.  They rushed you off to the Newborn Intensive Care Unit, and your dad was able to go down with you.  He snapped a picture of you with his phone and texted it to me.

They told me you weighed 3 pounds 4.5 ounces and were 16 3/4 inches long.  As soon as I was able, I joined your dad in the NICU to say hello.  They let me hold you for a couple minutes before it was time for me to head to recovery.  You were so small and so sweet and I already loved you.

Love,
Mom

Princess Tea Party

We requested a vacation day with Kylee months ago so we could have her on a Saturday for a friend birthday party.  We had to have her party a little early with trying to schedule around Matt's work and Boise State football :-)  But Kylee didn't mind!  We decided on a Princess Tea Party theme, and Kylee invited five of her friends to join us for the afternoon.

The decorations were simple, but Kylee loved them.

All of the girls came in their favorite princess attire, and we started off the party with some princess crafts - decorating tiaras and beading bracelets and necklaces, followed by painting fingernails.  

We then played "Kiss the Frog" - the princess version of Pin the Tail on the Donkey. 

Next up was the tea party!  On the menu was hot chocolate, lemonade, mini cupcakes, mini sandwiches, and mini oranges.  Matt did an excellent job taking drink orders and serving the girls.  Kylee thought that was pretty special. 

The last thing on our agenda was opening presents, followed by play time in Kylee's play room.  Each of the girls got to take home a little purse goody bag with some flower bracelets, fingernail polish, a princess wand, a princess notepad, and their beaded jewelry.  Kylee (our little social butterfly) had so much fun, and I loved watching her interact with her friends.  Happy almost 5th birthday to my sweet girl.

Trunk or Trick

We didn't have Kylee for Halloween this year, but we were glad our ward had a Trunk or Treat on a day we did have her!  Kylee was one cute BSU cheerleader.  My favorite was how she called it "Trunk or Trick".

Matt got someone to cover the first part of his shift at work so he could join us for the Trunk or Treat.  Of course we had the best trunk... Matt rigged a large spider up to the back of the Blazer, and when any kid would come to take a piece of candy, he dropped the spider down on them.  Kids were super spooked to take the candy and he even made one little kid cry :-(  But the older kids thought it was cool and kept coming back and back and back...

We severely underestimated how much candy to buy to pass out on Halloween.  We knew there were a lot of kids in our neighborhood, but they just kept flooding up to our door.  We had to turn our lights out by 7:50.  We'll definitely be buying more candy next year!